Hunny Bear Almonds by Carlos Swan
Like I’ve said many times before, good edible highs come from within and open you up to the world from the inside out. Some of my most creative, spiritual and grounded moments have been at the climax of a good edible buzz. It feels like medicine for my spirit. The tension tamer of my dreams, if you can imagine that sort of thing.
After this last term of school, I needed to hit the reset button. The holidays and winter weather are tough for everyone in different ways. Sitting in my house thinking about my own dilemmas, I tried hard to to shake off the negative energy with holiday cheer movies in front of me.
My honey and I started pondering movies to watch. So many options. The best part of Long winter breaks is the extensive collection of Holiday movies you can lay around and watch. You can zone out and live in the moment with your people and wildly above-average kitty cats. I got hungry early in the afternoon and thought I should scarf down some of those Honey Bear Almonds I picked up recently!
I had received the assignment to try out the product and piece together a truthful written account of my experience. I gladly took the challenge, as you can tell. I was watching Bad Santa when the almonds started to kick in. I got way into the movie and I started overthinking its plot and moral code. I felt an emotional journey blossoming. I knew it was a twisted movie and dark plot, but I always laughed my ass off in shock because of how shocking it was. You know what I’m saying?
The first bit of tension I felt release was in my right thigh. Then my left shoulder blade area right behind second or third rib. Next, tissues in my neck stretched and popped in a good way, and more tension released below my neck. My body was relaxing at a beautiful rate.
My mind was slow to follow. I started to feel real bad when Bernie Mac’s character got double-crossed by the Elf and was smashed to death with his van. I started to miss that joker a lot! I laughed to myself thinking of him, his quotes and mannerisms. Scenes from The Original Kings of Comedy and The Bernie Mac Show started to flash before my eyes. I had to take my attention away from the movie for a second and jumped on the Instagrams to see what was popping!
Sure as shit, the Bernie Mac bummer thing found me on there too. One of the first feeds that appeared on my fancy illuminated cylinder was Shaq’s instagram homepage (Hall of Fame NBA Basketball Player) and it was creepy what I found. He was using a new face recognition application that allowed him to have Bernie Mac’s face and voice. It was so freaky! I almost wept, but then I realized I was good and stoned.
Thinking this and understanding the situation made me laugh out loud, except I was not by myself. The cats glared at me with dubious eyes. I remember my Honey shaking her head at me and giggling. Whoops! Then I remembered that I was still hungry and could eat the rest of those almonds. By the end of the movie, I was all better and feeling loose. There was no more tension.
Over the next two days, I finished the next pack of Cajun spiced medicated almonds and munched on the non-medicated chili lime almonds, too. I loved the citrus sweet and savory salt flavors. Fiery flavors and I get along real nice. Two peas in a pod y’all! I loved the tang and crunch combo of both flavors.
I enjoyed these almonds with green medicine infused or not, and why shouldn’t I? I’m really trying to eat more healthy snacks in this new year and if you want to knock out two birds with one stone, grab some of these almonds when you’re in need of healthy fuel and an extra pop of magic.